Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Butt Butter

I received an email a few weeks ago from a female riding friend. Apparently she was having some "issues" with her behind...saddle sore. Obviously she felt that I could give her some good advice or be of some assistance. Well, with my wealth of knowledge and experience I was the obvious choice.

My first response was a smart "ass" comment like, "You should put more miles in because I really don't think you're riding enough."

With a little more thought on the topic I told her she should...
1. Invest in some good quality shorts
2. Use some chamois cream "Butt Butter"
3. Have a quality saddle

After all, as your butt goes so goes your ride. It's very important for a serious cyclist to make sure he/she takes very good care their ass.

I for one am a very strong advocate for the use of "Butt Butter". To slip on your cycling shorts without first applying a liberal amount of "Butt Butter" is simply asking for trouble. Not only does it prevent chaffing, which could lead to saddle sores, it just plain feels good. I like the cool moist feeling it has when you first get your shorts on. Plus, this stuff really works! Especially when it is hot and humid out.

My ass is, well, shall we say...not much of an ass at all. Skinny, bony little thing that needs comfort and protection. As a matter of fact my butt could probably use one of these.

Preferably with more padding. This particular saddle reminds me of my childhood and a neighborhood kid named Jeffrey. Now Jeffrey was somewhat mentally deficient and he was very well liked around town. He had a cruiser with nice big fat tires and what he often referred to as the most comfortable bike saddle ever produced. A beautiful Troxel with some type of shearling/sheepskin type cover. Jeffrey was very proud of his bike and his Troxel saddle. Of course Jeffrey was also known to carry frogs and snakes around in his pockets.
I really miss the old neighborhood.

Wow! I noticed that my "Butt Butter" is nearly gone. Time to ride over to REI and pick up another container.


chickenboy said...

i am really starting to wonder about my friend bill. it is only a matter of time before i check out his blog and read "all work and no play makes bill a dull boy" for an entire page.

Petite Chèvre said...

I am a hot and humid fan of Butt Butter. They have released a Euro style now I hear, butt I remain a fan of the traditional. For an added kick, try a little Aspercreme® under-layer.

Spin On

Judi said...

I starting using this other stuff called Ass Cream or something. Both work well.

Vito said...

Ass Cream! How original. At least it's not Paula's Butt Rub. That's a seasoning I use for grilling meat.

Madonna said...

Bill I'm very worried about you...

You should try David Zabriskis's new product